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All Deviations


You're not dead (yet) If you were, my world would be again the sound of hollow stone. Emptiness.
Shivering, a naked fear...barely awake, questions.
Why torture with uncaring fingers a unbeating piece of flesh that was once more wild and free than we dared to?
Now only the stomach feels, tornado of innocent guilt, nausea of too much courage.
Blame a mirror for happiness that once was, and no more.
Leaves, gasping for air on that shore with hope as night, black...tears just a cloth to cover shame of the purest thing.
Ah, but the furious wind never stops to call, the wolf responds when no soul sees...
For those afraid to fall end up in deepest seas.
©2007-2008 ~rowenabrennavart
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Submitted: December 4, 2007
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Author's Comments

Something that kept me awake last night for some time. It sucks, but please comment anyway :)
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Devious Comments

love 1 1 joy 0 0 wow 1 1 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0

~Blackheart276:iconBlackheart276: Dec 4, 2007, 4:08:07 AM Mood: Wow!
IT DOESN'T SUCK!!!!!!! :hug: :D I LOVE IT!!

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I'm in your post!! Shakin' mah fish!! :shakefish:
"If you stay, I don't need a Heaven." - Bella Swan
It's not 'OBSESSION', it's just 'DEEP DEVOTION'
:heart: I love you my dearly beloved :heart:
~Blackheart276:iconBlackheart276: Dec 4, 2007, 2:54:23 PM
:D What's not to like? It's amasing!!! :D I was surprised to c something that cool!

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I'm in your post!! Shakin' mah fish!! :shakefish:
"If you stay, I don't need a Heaven." - Bella Swan
It's not 'OBSESSION', it's just 'DEEP DEVOTION'
:heart: I love you my dearly beloved :heart:
~rowenabrennavart:iconrowenabrennavart: Dec 4, 2007, 3:04:18 PM
:blush: it was just something I come up with 'cos I couldn't sleep and..thank you. thank you so much :hug:

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I am Sinistra in the deviantART Harry Potter Crew!

AIDS Walk 2007
~Blackheart276:iconBlackheart276: Dec 4, 2007, 4:31:15 PM
:hug: It;s amasing! Trust me! :nod: :glomp:

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I'm in your post!! Shakin' mah fish!! :shakefish:
"If you stay, I don't need a Heaven." - Bella Swan
It's not 'OBSESSION', it's just 'DEEP DEVOTION'
:heart: I love you my dearly beloved :heart:
~rowenabrennavart:iconrowenabrennavart: Dec 4, 2007, 4:59:42 PM
yay!! free hugs and glomps!! I love those!! n__________________n :hug:

:icondweebdanceplz:

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I am Sinistra in the deviantART Harry Potter Crew!

AIDS Walk 2007
~Blackheart276:iconBlackheart276: Dec 5, 2007, 4:27:22 AM
Me 2!!!!!! :hug: :glomp: BUDDICHAN!

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I'm in your post!! Shakin' mah fish!! :shakefish:
"If you stay, I don't need a Heaven." - Bella Swan
It's not 'OBSESSION', it's just 'DEEP DEVOTION'
:heart: I love you my dearly beloved :heart:
*Sakebi-chan:iconSakebi-chan: Jan 17, 2008, 3:03:41 PM
you wrote 'a' instead of 'an' somewhere.
It's not that bad at all, but for some reason I don't really like the first line. It doesn't really sway you in like the first line of a poem should.
Also, the flow is pretty ok, but the ending doesn't quite feel... like an end.

I'm not good at writing myself ^^; so I can't give you more useful tips, but I hope you get what I mean... :XD:

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:butterfly::rose:~Haru Urara ni Hikari ga sashite somaru Hana wa Nijiiro~ :rose::butterfly:
~rowenabrennavart:iconrowenabrennavart: Jan 18, 2008, 10:04:52 AM Mood: Love
I do that "a" thing a lot! XD I guess I was sleeping in the day they gave it in school or somethin'! And this wasn't to be a poem at first, and yes, the ending sucks. But it did help me sleep, so I guess I'm happy with it! ^-^ And thanks for reading and taking your time to comment, it always means a lot to me :)

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I am Sinistra in the deviantART Harry Potter Crew!

AIDS Walk 2007